âAnother has done me wrong? Let him see to it. He has his own tendencies, and his own affairs. What I have now is what the common nature has willed, and what I endeavour to accomplish now is what my nature wills.â
âMarcus Aurelius, Meditations, 5.25
Abraham Lincoln occasionally got fuming mad with a subordinate, one of his generals, even a friend. Rather than taking it out on that person directly, heâd write a long letter, outlining his case why they were wrong and what he wanted them to know. Then Lincoln would fold it up, put the letter in the desk drawer, and never send it. Many of these letters survive only by chance.
He knew, as the former emperor of Rome knew, that itâs easy to fight back. Itâs tempting to give them a piece of your mind. But you almost always end up with regret. You almost always wish you hadnât sent the letter. Think of the last time you flew off the handle. What was the outcome? Was there any benefit?
Some people spend their lives chasing good things: health, wealth, pleasure, achievement. Others try to avoid the bad things with equal energy: sickness, poverty, pain. These look like two drastically different approaches but in the end, they are the same. The Stoics continually reminded themselves that so many of the things we desire and avoid are beyond our control. Instead of chasing impossibilities, the Stoics trained to be equally prepared and equally suited to thrive in either condition. They trained to be indifferent. This is a great power and the cultivation of this skill is a very powerful exercise.
âOf all the things that are, some are good, others bad, and yet others indifferent. The good are virtues and all that share in them; the bad are the vices and all that indulge them; the indifferent lie in between virtue and vice and include wealth, health, life, death, pleasure, and pain.â
âEpictetus, Discourses, 2.19.1 2b-13
âMy reasoned choice is as indifferent to the reasoned choice of my neighbour, as to his breath and body. However much weâve been made for cooperation, the ruling reason in each of us is master of its own affairs. If this werenât the case, the evil in someone else could become my harm, and God didnât mean for someone else to control my misfortune.â
âMarcus Aurelius, Meditations, 8.56
âThere are things in life which are advantageous and disadvantageousâboth beyond our control.â
âSeneca, Moral Letters, 92.16
If we were to describe Stoicism in one sentence, it would be this: A Stoic believes they donât control the world around them, only how they respondâand that they must always respond with courage, temperance, wisdom, and justice.
Summary of Daily Stoic 4 Stoic Virtues.
âThe chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my ownâ
âEpictetus
Wisdom is harnessing what the philosophy teaches then wielding it in the real world. As Seneca put it, âWorks not words.â
ââIf you seek tranquillity, do less.â Or (more accurately) do whatâs essentialâwhat the logos of a social being requires, and in the requisite way. Which brings a double satisfaction: to do less, better. Because most of what we say and do is not essential. If you can eliminate it, youâll have more time, and more tranquillity. Ask yourself at every moment, âIs this necessary?ââ
âMarcus Aurelius, Meditations, 4.24
Temperance is the knowledge that abundance comes from having what is essential. The Stoics often used temperance interchangeably with âself-control.â Self-control, not just towards material goods, but self-control, harmony, and good discipline alwaysâin pleasure or pain, admiration or contempt, failure or triumph. Temperance is guarded against extremes, not relying on the fleetingness of pleasure for happiness nor allowing the fleetingness of pain to destroy it.
âAnd a commitment to justice in your own acts. Which means: thought and action resulting in the common good. What you were born to do.â
âMarcus Aurelius, Meditations, 9.31
Justice is âthe principle which constitutes the bond of human society and of a virtual community of life.â
Epictetus said, âSeeking the very best in ourselves means actively caring for the welfare of other human beings.â
âDonât you know life is like a military campaign? One must serve on watch, another in reconnaissance, another on the front line. . . . So it is for usâeach personâs life is a kind of battle, and a long and varied one too. You must keep watch like a soldier and do everything commanded. . . . You have been stationed in a key post, not some lowly place, and not for a short time but for life.â
âEpictetus, Discourses, 3.24.31-36
Epictetus was once asked which words would help a person thrive. âTwo words should be committed to memory and obeyed,â he said, âpersist and resist.â
Courage to face misfortune. Courage to face death. Courage to risk yourself for the sake of your fellow man. Courage to hold to your principles, even when others get away with or are rewarded for disregarding theirs. Courage to speak your mind and insist on truth.